Thriving In Love & Money with Shaunti Feldhahn
If you’ve been married for even a short period of time, you’ve had at least one money fight. What if you could really “get” where your spouse is coming from when it comes to money - and they could “get” you? In this episode of Stewardship Leader, Shaunti Feldhahn talks about her and her husband Jeff’s new book, Thriving In Love & Money, and the research that has led them to the 5 distinct factors that tend to be running beneath the surface of money issues in marriage. Their book and the additional resources they’ve created will prove invaluable as you minister to the couples in your church.
THINGS YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE
“Only 23% of people talk about money openly, while 77% avoid it or are defensive about this topic.”
“The average pastor is part of the 77% that would rather avoid talking about money.”
“Pastors, especially stewardship pastors, can help transform the conversation about money by helping the marriages in your church to have the conversation around money.”
“You” processed this decision, but “we” didn’t. It’s time for me to do on the outside what you just did on the inside.”
“Read the “values” chapter or any chapter in this book with pen in hand highlighting things that are true about you, and then discuss them with each other, and suddenly you don’t need a therapist. You just got a personalized tour into how your spouse thinks and feels.”
THINGS YOU WILL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE
The 5 distinct factors that tend to be running beneath the surface of money issues in marriage.
There’s a resistance for a couple to be one in their marriage due to selfishness and a desire for independence.
Each person in the marriage has different values and sees the other’s choice of values as the wrong values.
Men and women tend to have two different sets of underlining sets of fears, worries, and insecurities; their individual financial cliffs. In their attempt to push away from their own financial cliffs, they inadvertently pull their spouse closer to the edge of their own different financial cliffs.
Couples have different and often opposite ways of processing through money decisions, which causes stress and anxiety around financial decisions.
Couples have strong reactions based on faulty assumptions often due to our past experiences related to money.
Resources
Thriving In Love & Money book & workbook.
Thriving In Love & Money website
